"You know I'm not about to make judgement calls." But it didn't mean that she had to approve of any of this. Whether or not Matt could fight the draw was one thing, but it sounded like this man, He Ming, didn't have much control over his powers. It was reckless and irresponsible. She never had a good opinion of Matt's playmates, unless they were mutual friends (which was rare). But this didn't make her think any better of him.
"Maybe they find all of this shit entertaining?" She shrugged, scooting closer as he brought out the pipe, a bright smile on her face at the prospect of Opium. "They want drama, they throw a bunch of us together and watch the fall out. It would explain why they bring in vampires, but provide nothing."
She made a face, giving a scoff. "Well no, he won't complain. He's already done this once before and is tangling with another vampire. I'm starting to wonder if he's a bite bunny. You know? Those mortals that chase after being a vampire's pet because they see it as some sort of thrill."
Not that it mattered. Whatever got him off, she supposed. "How is it that I feel too old for that shit, but you're older than me and still getting pulled in?" She poked him in the side. "Shouldn't you be feeling like an old man and more of a homebody?"
At least normally, Matthew's playmates weren't dangerous. Just a little flesh and blood and sex to entertain him, but this place brought in a much different brand of person. Thankfully, he and Selene had gone through this before, and he didn't hold her opinions of the people he slept with with much important.
She was free to her opinions and he didn't expect her to not have them.
"Could be. Though I suppose he might not be so inclined to jump into Cassidy's mouth again. Considering... If he even remembers, we'll see." He hadn't thought about bite bunnies in a long time and really, it was a viable option.
He chuckled at her quip, fliching playfully a little at her poking finger. "Had I a home that was my own, I might. Don't tell me you haven't gone out and sampled the wares. Even on a good day?"
"It's only you, me and Cassidy who are vampires, right? So that means we don't have to worry about anyone else with fangs making the same mistake?" She's not too worried about herself. She doesn't go out too often and her blood partners are the people she paid. Unless he was moonlighting as a whore, she didn't expect to actually run into him.
Her opinions used to be a lot more harsh, born out of jealousy and frustration. Time tempered much of that and she was simply glad to be around Matt, comfortable with her place in his life.
"Eh, not so much." Considering the sort of woman she was in her younger years, it would come as a surprise. "I'm not really social anymore. I don't like strangers." Which she knew came from her experience in the compound. It was hard to say who she could trust and who might try to hurt her again. She didn't want to take the risk.
"Seras as well, but I think her sexuality saves her the hardest options provided." It put Airy right out of the running and Matthew hadn't asked about Seras's mechanics much yet. Distractions were always abound.
It was nice to be able to brush closely past the reality they were in; Matthew was what he was and without the stress of her reaction, he was easier and less defensive about it.
"Selene," he said with a gentle admonishment and a worried look. "You should try. These people are.. largely harmless. Even if you don't fuck them, go and see the souls that surround us. There are people we've never seen here, personalities and skills. It's not a big wide world, but the population isn't bad."
"Oh. Good for her. Looks like the women are going to have it easier here than you men." Which she'll be endlessly amused by. Matt, she could see getting into trouble. That was just how he lived. Cassidy was the one who surprised her.
"I don't like people the same way I used to, Matthew." She answered, leaning back against the pillows as her hair fanned out under her. A small trail of smoke curled towards the ceiling. If it weren't for this, she might feel panic rising at the back of her neck.
"When there are too many around, I start feeling like they're going to jump me again and I'll be back in the compound. I don't have my strength here. I can't defend myself like I used to." Not that it helped when it counted.
"Perhaps so," he conceded with a quirk of his lips but she wasn't wrong about him. Trouble found him more often then not, though it was unadmittedly through his own folly or misstep.
"I fear you're going to lose your mind in here," he replied seriously, mirth slipping away. "You said yourself that they're meant to feed us - at some point you will have to learn. They are all around. They can't truly be avoided."
"You're saying that to a Malk? I already lost my mind a long time ago, amore." She gave a sharp laugh, coughing out a large puff of smoke. "What little I had left, they fucked with." She didn't talk about this much, that she was joking about it at all spoke of her trust in him.
Seeing him sober, growing serious in his concern for her, Selene let her defenses slip. "I know. I'm not...I just don't feel safe." Which was never going to change. Either she fought through that or she let it consume her. "I can do something on the network, but I don't know about crowds just yet."
His face stayed serious in the face of her laughter, dark eyes searching her features. It was a heavy concern - the older they got, the more likely their path towards that and Malkavians were the worst of all when they went.
"I'm not silly enough to suggest crowds for you." You didn't take a heart patient on a rollercoaster ride either. "But the network still keeps you away from them. Try the baths, maybe, the library. Places where crowds aren't a worry.
Humans can give you a lot Selene, just as much as they've taken. You just have to give them the chance."
Her madness had always been a large part of her life. It was the source of her identity and the reason why she played into her grandsire's ridiculous prophecy. The vampire devil had to be a bit mad to do half of things she had done.
Age, instead of driving her further into insanity, had somehow brought reason and stability. So long as she continued the methods of keeping her temper in check, Caine could fade into obscurity.
"I was never fond of humans, Matt. The compound made it just more...pronounced." But she knew she couldn't avoid people forever. "Look, for the first time, maybe you could be with me?"
Or so she hoped. Matthew had a different view of on Caine and the chaos that their family and created for the rest of them and the world around them. He resented the clan a bit for what they'd done to all three of the sisters, but he'd long learned where his place was.
"They're not bad, in whole. Just like we aren't, in whole." He reached over and wrapped his hand in with hers. "Of course I will. And even the second or third if you like. I can stay close. Help."
She wasn't relegated to what her grandsire made her. Diana might be considered the messiah by them, but she didn't know what became of the cult under their brother's leadership. Despite herself, Selene had been pulled back in for the sake of helping others. Not exactly what the devil would do.
"There aren't many people I'd trust to bring me out more. Only you." She murmured, leaning over to rest her head against his lap. "All of this is just a bit overwhelming."
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"Maybe they find all of this shit entertaining?" She shrugged, scooting closer as he brought out the pipe, a bright smile on her face at the prospect of Opium. "They want drama, they throw a bunch of us together and watch the fall out. It would explain why they bring in vampires, but provide nothing."
She made a face, giving a scoff. "Well no, he won't complain. He's already done this once before and is tangling with another vampire. I'm starting to wonder if he's a bite bunny. You know? Those mortals that chase after being a vampire's pet because they see it as some sort of thrill."
Not that it mattered. Whatever got him off, she supposed. "How is it that I feel too old for that shit, but you're older than me and still getting pulled in?" She poked him in the side. "Shouldn't you be feeling like an old man and more of a homebody?"
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She was free to her opinions and he didn't expect her to not have them.
"Could be. Though I suppose he might not be so inclined to jump into Cassidy's mouth again. Considering... If he even remembers, we'll see." He hadn't thought about bite bunnies in a long time and really, it was a viable option.
He chuckled at her quip, fliching playfully a little at her poking finger. "Had I a home that was my own, I might. Don't tell me you haven't gone out and sampled the wares. Even on a good day?"
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Her opinions used to be a lot more harsh, born out of jealousy and frustration. Time tempered much of that and she was simply glad to be around Matt, comfortable with her place in his life.
"Eh, not so much." Considering the sort of woman she was in her younger years, it would come as a surprise. "I'm not really social anymore. I don't like strangers." Which she knew came from her experience in the compound. It was hard to say who she could trust and who might try to hurt her again. She didn't want to take the risk.
"I don't like leaving my room very much."
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It was nice to be able to brush closely past the reality they were in; Matthew was what he was and without the stress of her reaction, he was easier and less defensive about it.
"Selene," he said with a gentle admonishment and a worried look. "You should try. These people are.. largely harmless. Even if you don't fuck them, go and see the souls that surround us. There are people we've never seen here, personalities and skills. It's not a big wide world, but the population isn't bad."
no subject
"I don't like people the same way I used to, Matthew." She answered, leaning back against the pillows as her hair fanned out under her. A small trail of smoke curled towards the ceiling. If it weren't for this, she might feel panic rising at the back of her neck.
"When there are too many around, I start feeling like they're going to jump me again and I'll be back in the compound. I don't have my strength here. I can't defend myself like I used to." Not that it helped when it counted.
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"I fear you're going to lose your mind in here," he replied seriously, mirth slipping away. "You said yourself that they're meant to feed us - at some point you will have to learn. They are all around. They can't truly be avoided."
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Seeing him sober, growing serious in his concern for her, Selene let her defenses slip. "I know. I'm not...I just don't feel safe." Which was never going to change. Either she fought through that or she let it consume her. "I can do something on the network, but I don't know about crowds just yet."
no subject
"I'm not silly enough to suggest crowds for you." You didn't take a heart patient on a rollercoaster ride either. "But the network still keeps you away from them. Try the baths, maybe, the library. Places where crowds aren't a worry.
Humans can give you a lot Selene, just as much as they've taken. You just have to give them the chance."
no subject
Age, instead of driving her further into insanity, had somehow brought reason and stability. So long as she continued the methods of keeping her temper in check, Caine could fade into obscurity.
"I was never fond of humans, Matt. The compound made it just more...pronounced." But she knew she couldn't avoid people forever. "Look, for the first time, maybe you could be with me?"
no subject
"They're not bad, in whole. Just like we aren't, in whole." He reached over and wrapped his hand in with hers. "Of course I will. And even the second or third if you like. I can stay close. Help."
no subject
"There aren't many people I'd trust to bring me out more. Only you." She murmured, leaning over to rest her head against his lap. "All of this is just a bit overwhelming."